Tobe’s law of friendship.

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If I call you a friend, we must distinguish competing from inspiring. As we get older, different plateaus are being scaled, new heights reached and additional wealth is being amassed. I personally have seen relationships deteriorate due to jealousy and envy in situations where love should conquer all those feelings. As a friend in competition, if you tell me something you achieved, I will immediately think of how to top that feat, disregarding the strive it took for you to accomplish this. It doesn’t take a brain surgeon to see how this is problematic. It’s common to want to celebrate with the people you love. Men are scared to use the word “love” when it comes to their boys/friends, but if you don’t love me, we can’t call ourselves friends.

I have a close group of friends that I love dearly and outside of the jokes I crack every now and then, they truly inspire me to stay focused. I felt the need to write about my friends and sentiments towards them due to social media. Lately I have been seeing a lot of great things online that make my mind wander. Whether it’s a guy with a fancy car, another degree, wife, job etc. I sometimes think about what I can do better to get these same treasures. Amid these thoughts I remember Jeremiah 29:11:

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” NIV

“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.” KJV

What social media deems great for me ultimately might not align with what God has planned for me. As I continue my journey with friends, family and bystanders, I always want to be inspired to become better, but never to compete for someone else’s plot. I’ll give a personal example:

I have a friend Josh, who recently graduated with his MBA and closed on his 1st home. This inspires me, as one day I would love to get a house, but right now, it is his moment. I could ask a bunch of questions like “how much was the property, what was your credit score, what interest rate you get etc.,” but it takes away from his accomplishment. While I am excited for his crib and can’t wait to hear his experiences with the buying/closing process, I must let him bask in his glory. I am extremely proud of him!

I wasn’t sure if I should post this, but then I remembered this is a blog lol. Hope you enjoyed reading my thoughts!

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